Plague Songs - Witches / by Rich Hobbs

Growing older has its hitches 

As the body suffers glitches 

Til you think that every itch is 

Proof you harbour inner snitches 

Who’ll grass you up to Death, whose stitches 

Will bind your shroud before she ditches 

You in the grave as black as pitch is, 

And deadly duller than Ipswich is. 

And so we all ape dumb ostriches; 

Try to ignore all random twitches; 

Say Life’s so easy – like Quidditch is - 

But all the while we hear the scritches 

Of Death’s nib... So embrace Life’s riches 

While you can! And yet, the bitch is 

Growing older has its hitches 

As the body suffers glitches...

But now my turds all float! Like witches!!