Like any decent person would
We stared unspeaking at our drinks
Still pretending not to hear them
Arsing at the Wake
They say they’re her rich relatives
Although we’ve never met before
Their teenager’s now doing handstands
Arsing at the Wake
The ashtray’s full up on the coffin,
Their glasses stain rings on its lid
Some woman howls in raucous grief
Arsing at the Wake
That man’s now bragging on their closeness
And braying about all he did
To comfort her when she was dying
Arsing at the Wake
Although we’ve heard they robbed her blind
Then made her go out on the game
And beat her til she gave her passwords
Arsing at the Wake
They never phoned, they’d never visit,
They never sent a Christmas card,
But now they drawl how much they loved her
Arsing at the Wake
That souvenir from Ghent’s just smashed.
She promised that to us, you know.
Somehow the curtains have caught fire.
Arsing at the Wake
Those boys’ve opened up the coffin.
They’ve sat her up and raised a glass
To pour more sherry through her stiff lips
Arsing at the Wake
A drunken uncle’s mawkishly
Slurring that she’s still alive,
And that they’ll both now go out clubbing
Arsing at the Wake
They’ve emptied out the cabinets
And trodden quiche into the rug
And now they’re tearing up her photos
Arsing at the Wake
We’ve been locked in an upstairs closet.
Downstairs the hoots and screams get worse.
Smoke’s seeping beneath the door now.
Arsing at the Wake.